Hello! Thank you to everyone who showed up to our Big Boob Cowgirl Anniversary Event! Special thanks to: Kate Crescenzo, Stephanie Pimiento, and Jet Jameson for reading your beautiful pieces I cried at every single one of them.
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Good Omens by Ashlon Rose
A little girl, open mouth drinking rain from the sky
Half priced flowers from the expensive flower shop
A phone call from a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while
Catching yourself saying a phrase that someone you knew 100 years ago used to say
Finishing a task you have been wanting to do for weeks, and it was actually very easy
Walking outside and realizing you dressed perfectly for the weather
Lowering your tense shoulders
The outfit you had planned in your head looking even better in real life
Taking a nap and waking up and actually feeling rested
Losing your bookmark in a book and opening the book up to the right page
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Hannah Wolfe
I.
I recently had a dream that I’ve never had before. In it I had a cereal box. I ate each piece of sugared and puffed corn one by one, until I reached into the box and pulled out a kitten. I looked at the kitten, its body stiff and dry, and thought, “How strange. This isn’t a piece of cereal.”
Then the kitten moved, and she shook out her fur, stretched her spine, and I held her in my palm as she stared up at me. She was all white with grey spots on her back and orange-tipped ears. I held her to my chest, and she purred.
She was so soft, and I felt bad that I almost ate her. I took her home with me, and when we got there she let me give her a bath, and then I gave her a fish for dinner. Then, my other two cats came out of my bedroom, furious.
I don’t know how I knew this, but their names were Spirulina (like the dried biomass of Arthrospira platensis) and Citronella (like the grass oil).
“You can’t just bring home another cat,” Spirulina said, disgusted.
“Exactly, you can’t just bring home another cat,” said Citronella.
“You already have two of us. You’re not allowed to have three,” said Spirulina.
“Yeah, you’re not allowed to have three,” said Citronella.
“Get rid of it,” they said in unison. As they said it, a huge streak of lightning whipped across the sky, followed by a crack of thunder.
I held the kitten in my palm and cried. She was so sweet, so soft, and I had to give her away. Some time passed, and then I walked to a shelter, holding her pressed against my chest, and then the shelter took her, and I couldn’t stop crying.
Back at home, Citronella and Spirulina dozed in their matching cat beds, and I cried and cried. I knew I did the right thing, but I didn’t want to. I missed her.
In this dream, some friends came over for a visit and I told them what had happened.
“You gave her away?” said one friend.
“I had to,” I replied.
“How could you do such a thing?”
II.
I have a recurring dream that visits me every few weeks, and when it comes I know I’ll have this dream every night for the next three days, and I’m powerless to stop it.
It always starts at my childhood home, in my bedroom, and then I go out and walk down that hallway and my family is in the living room. My brother, my mom, and my dad, and sometimes some other visitors but I don’t remember them. My parents are both there, so I must be young, maybe 15, before they divorced.
There’s a sliding glass door that opens this living room into the backyard, and when I look outside I see a cluster of cats. There are a good number, maybe 15, in the backyard, and at first they appear normal but when you look closer you see that some are missing eyes, standing on their hindlegs, letting out strange caterwauls, have long pointed tongues, have human fingers, are smiling at you. Some of them dance together, coiling their tails like whips.
Sometimes when I look back into the living room, there are also cats inside with us. They seem harmless, but deformed, but unusual, but smiling. Sometimes they stay outside.
When I see the cats, I know what’s next. I walk to the front door, my family follows, and when I open the door I see huge black bears running past our house. They run down the street, and I see them tackle and begin to eat someone. Sometimes they eat someone I know, but it’s usually a stranger or a group of strangers.
I know what’s next. I close the door, but we run and the bears are in the backyard, the cats are screaming, and then the bears burst through the front door with a tremendous crack and splintering of wood. Then, my mom and brother split off towards the right, and my dad and I run to the left, into my parent’s bedroom. I don’t know where my mom and brother go.
My dad and I, we aren’t able to close the door in time, and an enormous black bear snarls at us, lumbering towards us with impossibly huge claws, slobbering teeth, and I always have the same thought. I’m about to watch my dad get eaten alive by bears, and then they’ll eat me.
Then, my dad takes a pillow from his bed, throws it as far as he can, and that distracts the bear long enough for us to escape through the bedroom window. Sometimes we run down the street, sometimes we fly away, but in this dream I never see my mom or brother again.
Then I wake up, jaw clenched so hard it aches, sometimes biting into my tongue, fists balled, sweating, heart pounding, and tired. If I have this dream more than five days in a row, I start sleeping as little as possible, with the lights on, hoping to find a dreamless sleep, empty and nothing.